"Some values are…like sugar on the doughnut, legitimate, desirable, but insufficient, apart from the doughnut itself. We need substance as well as frosting."
- Ralph Tyler Flewelling
I have written in years past articles on teaching students the value of giving. I thought it would interesting to follow up on that theme, but shift the focus. Our present day culture is one of overabundance for most of us and for many children a seemingly, endless stream of material things. It is a challenging task to teach children to be gracious receivers. In other words, with our "instant gratification" society--and with some kids (and adults too for that matter)--it's more, more…it's never enough. Teaching kids to value a gift, no matter how small, tangible or intangible, is vital.
It seems to be a sad but unfortunately a stark reality that our society has put so much emphasis on the "he who has the MOST toys, wins!" perspective. Is it any wonder that the number of violent incidents involving children has increased? Human life and basic values have taken a nosedive in comparison to our culture's need for convenience and material goods. Children battle the influences of the media, television, movies, radio, music, which constantly dangle the carrots of the latest fad, fashion, or mania in front of their impressionable minds and outstretched hands. How can we influence children away from the mind set that a person's worth is based upon their possessions, instead of their innate worth as a unique human being?
The last eight years of my teaching experience were spent in classrooms for students with severe behavior/emotional disorders. A large percentage of these students were survivors of appalling physical, emotional abuse, and neglect. Their self-esteem was virtually nonexistent. And yet, it never ceased to amaze me how in a nurturing environment, the ability to value themselves and others would blossom and begin to grow. I believe there is a part of the human spirit in us all that cannot grow unless it learns the value of life and gives part of itself to others. When we instill in our students the desire to give of themselves to others, I believe we are doing more to nurture self-esteem and encourage growth of the spirit. As the Christmas season fast approaches, in the midst of all the rush and excitement of preparation, let's take time to teach our students to treasure the lasting joy of what it means to value both the gift and the giver.
A fellow teacher along with her students has graciously contributed the following ideas. Thank you Mary, as always for your wonderful ideas and your heart for children.
I do a social/emotional thematic unit on caring and sharing in November to lead up to Christmas and to help us prepare for Thanksgiving. I am going to put the kids to work writing letters to nursing homes and jails to touch the hearts and lives of those who will not be able to celebrate with their loved ones this holiday season. I am also going to have the kids donate coins or maybe make something that we can sell (chocolate lollipops or some kind of pins and jewelry) so we may purchase a holiday gift for someone needy. Please keep in mind all of my kids are needy and all receive free lunch. But I want them to start counting their blessings and not feel needy.
We did a beautiful thing called the 5 kernels of corn for Thanksgiving and there wasn't a dry eye in the classroom. My para and I counted out 5 kernels of candy corn and had each one represent a special blessing in our lives. I started and the kids joined in. It was great! I teach 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade students who are severely emotionally disturbed.
Mary's students did a survey about what her student's felt they really wanted or would value most for Christmas. Here are the results. The survey was done in the form of a quiet, independent daily journal. After the writing, there was a time for sharing... Get your Kleenex.
Steve: I wish I was home with my mom. I wish I could see my mom every day. I wish I were HOME. I wish there was no such thing as a foster home. I wish I could have a family Christmas.
Tyst: I wish I could go home for Christmas to be with my mom and dad and my family. I would like to be with my sister and brother and old friends. I would like to go back to my old neighborhood.
Marcus: I wish for Dreamcast, a new bike, and a WWF wrestling ring.
Arthur: I wish for Hot Wheels, robots, and Power Rangers.
George: I wish my cousin will get better. He fell and got hurt badly. I wish my mom thought I could be trusted.
Emmanuel: I wish for my mom, dad, and sister to stop fighting. I wish for peace in my house. I wish my father would never get sick and have to go to the hospital again. I wish my sister would treat me kind.
Montana: I want a WWF wrestling ring and a million dollars.
Dashawn: I want Dreamcast, Gameboy Color, remote control car, and I wish I could stay with my team forever. (**The team represents the class.**)
Michael: I wish for a house and that my brother would get better. (**His brother has been hospitalized twice for asthma emergencies and had lengthy hospital stays.**)
Rosa: I wish for a nail salon. I also wish that my brother could come here from Africa. I would also want my mom to get better and stop having pain in her back.
Eugene: I wish for a sister or brother. I wish I do not move. I wish I could stay in this class forever.
We talked at great length about our wishes and giving and receiving when the survey was complete.v
